.

"So apa kamu buat kat sini?" tanya pakcik tu.
(Err... membuat pasu bunga?) "Saja buang masa... dah lepas urut ni bagi keluar peluh pulak..."

"Ooo.. ye ke... hehehe. Kamu ni Melayu rupanya iyer? Camana urut tadi? OK? Kamu ambik sapa tadi? Dah lama sampai?" tanya pakcik tu lagi. Mid-40s, salt and pepper hair, plump without being too chubby, burly without being stocky, trying to look serious but his hands kept scratching the wooden panels... the nervous malu-tapi-mau type probably... I don't know whether he's trying to be friendly or actually interested to know my answers.
"OK, biasa aja. Kalau sakit badan bebetul saya ambik Salman atau Ah Kau, kalau sesaja nak releks badan nak tidur saya ambik Shahrin. So, arini ambik Shahrin."

"Oic, betul cakap kamu, I ambik Salman tadi, selalunya kalau nak ambik dia kena book awal2, kalau tak lambat le kena tunggu... lagipun dia urut semua sekali... semua sekali".
(Uh-huh... napa nak stress last sekali tu ekk? Nak suruh aku tanya ke? Koserss.. taula ko cute) "Oic, bagusla camtu... so, selain sini abang gi mana lagi ekk? Ada tempat2 bleh rekomen tak?"

"Ada tu ada, tapi jarang ke tempat lain. Rghupa kedai2 tu lain skit. Kedai nampak open sangat, lepas tu yg pergi semua muda2 lembut2, rasa tak selesa. Kat Subang ada, kat Selayang ada..."
(Rghupa? Rupa? Orang Perak ke ni? Jauh berjalan bang?! Hehehhe... Eh? Tak suka lembut2? Abang ke akak ni? Hiskk... ok gak akak ada misai nih... hmmm) "Oooo... paham2..."

"So Shahrin urut semua sekali jugak ke?"
(Ha'a... napa? Nak demo ke? Ke nak tolong bagi demo?) "Iyer, urut bebetul le, takla urut lebih2 yang lebih2... heheh". (Dia cakap dengan aku nih, tapi tgk tmpt arang batu tu pulak, bad eye contact tul, camana la nak jadik businessman?)

"Oooo.. so belum lagi la ni?"
(Belum? Belum apa la ni? Belum beli TV warna ke? Koserla soalan2 matematik nih) "Ha'a.. belum lagi..."

yesterday was not a perfect day to begin with. Went for my 2nd parking test at Ulu Langat and had miserably failed. I went out and knocked down a pole, pretty smart eh?....anyway, feeling down like hell and everything seems very wrong in every way after that. So I went home and called everybody that I could think of and blabbered about my shortcomings, not that they care but I had to tell evryone so i can get it out from my system. I was a bit calm after the 8th call and proceeded to gay.com after a friend suggested to me on hooking up with anybody just for comfort and a little bit more. So there I was just parking my nick and playing trivia at mirc and after about half an hour somebody ping me, well..what can i say...this guy was really aggresive in his approach and somehow deep down i was quite intrigued. But after several lines, i detected something funny about his chat line, i noticed that he kept on saying dear this dear that as if it sounded so endearing, well not to me, thank you very much. He wanted a meeting over coffee and I told him that I wasnt interested in having mere coffee and I couldnt be bothered to go all the way to KL for that cuppa. He insisted and told me how he adored my pic and went on describing things which was so flattery to me that I eventually agreed but I told him the meeting should be at my house and not at some coffee joint or a hotel as he had proposed. He agreed immediately and told me to wait for him for apprixomately an hour. Before he log off he mentioned to me that he was good looking with mix parentage and have a VERY nice body for he often frequented Dynasty hotel gym facilities. I was obviously smitten with the fact (as he had presented to me) that I would be meeting a 37 year old good looking hunk. Before anything, I have warned him that I'm a chub and told him not be dissapointed if I wasnt something that he would have expected. He told me he's quite cool with chub guys and told me that my body size doesnt count, it was my demeanour that attracted him in the very first place. So it was settle then, we agreed to meet and I caution him that I wasnt up for any sex or it's equivalent, he said ok, he just want to be with me and have an eye to eye meeting with me. After we finished chatting, I felt quite ecstatic and the things i said about not having sex with him, well it was just pure puny lie, hell, who in this world would decline sex when a sex object is infront of him. I did my usual routine of cleaning myself up and stuff and smiling to myself silly. Well, he did arrived at the supposed time he promised and with just one look I could tell it was him for he was not as manly as he described he was and the best part was that he didnt have a great body (he told me more than seven times that he possess an envious body thx to his gym routine). Hell, what the feck should i do at that time? ask him to go back to his home and said goodbye? It was the lie about his appearance that gutted me the most, i dont fecking mind if you're fat or slim, just fecking tell me the truth about your self, dont make me live with false hope and false fantasy and how do you expect me to carry out the fantasy when the make-believe wasnt there. I greeted him and invited him inside my house, and he got the nerve to ask me this : you like my great body baby? This is over-confident to the max man, his tummy itself is as flabby as mine, and he was as melayu as melayu get, what with the chinese look claim? He proceeded to tell me that he was horny and ask me where the bedroom was. In my mind i was like saying to myself: do I have to deal with this? I told him that I'm not up for sex and just want to have conversation as he had earlier proposed during our chat session. He paused for a while, then he said ok, let's talk in your bedroom. I should have seen it coming, but me being me reluctantly agreed to enter my bedroom with him. and he told me that my room is quite hot and he needed to undress in order to make himself comfortable. Can I say no? so there he was half naked and on my bed and keep on saying, come on baby, come to me baby let's make love baby.......what the feck is that? I told him off and ask him to leave but he resisted, he then said to me; 'if you dont want to make love to me, the least you can do is suck my cock' the nerve! anyway, i told him nicely that I'm just not in the mood and instead I swiched on my computer and show him some gay movies that I have downloaded. So he just sat quietly and stroke while watching the movie while i dont know what to do sit at the end of one corner and just remain clueless. I thought to myself, i have to get rid of him fast, he will obviously leave whenever he managed to cum. But after the third movie, he was still strong and there was no sign of him cumming. So I did the unthinkable, I went to him and grab his cock and started to you know what until he cum. He's one clever bugger. He left after that and as soon as he left my house, suddenly i felt it, i felt really really horny....while i was doing him, i didnt feel much of anything, just like an obligatory things to do in order for an objective to be achieved. At that moment i was up for anything, then, i received a call...and this call really made up my day.....i'm out now maybe i would continue about the call and its eventful result tomorrow......bye

Hello. Apa khabar semua? Well, last weekend, minggu ketiga, cutikan? Saya telah pergi ke kuantan untuk jumpa seorang kawan saya. Sudah setahun setengah saya tak jumpa dia. Dia baru pindah ke Kuantan 6 bulan aja dari Melaka. Anyway, sejak saya masuk ke Pahang, mulalah hujan. Saya pun tak buat apa. Saya sampai pada hari Sabtu dan terus ke rumah kawan saya.

Saya betul marah kerana hujan tak berhenti! Hujan berhenti pada petang hari Sabtu tu dan kita pun pergi ke telok chempedek. Tak der apa pun! Kami nak pergi Cherating pada hari Ahad tapi tak boleh kerana hujan turun lagi! Satu hari pulak. Anyway, hujan pun berhenti pada malam Ahad. Kami makan malam di sebuah restoran ditebing sungai Pahang. Dari tempat kami berdua duduk, saya nampak ada 4 kawan. 3 daripada mereka biasa. Ada yang pakai shorts, seorang pakai jeans. Tapi satu daripada mereka adalah chub. Dia tu mungkin 168 cm dan berat badan dalam 110 kg. Handsome betul. Dan yang best punya, dia tu memakai kain pelikat dan t-shirt! Betul handsome pulak. Saya asyik tengok dia aja. Ada kali dia bangun dan tengok saya. Rasanya dia suka saya tapi dia dengan kawan dia dan saya pulak dengan kawan saya. Saya dan kawan saya bangun dulu untuk balik. Dia pun lambai tangan. That makes my day!!

My Chub webteam, particularly Gemuk Chub, thank you for inviting me to somehow write my two cents worth in this blog, though i doubt that it would amount to anything but at least hmmmm...why do we like to say at least this, at least that, is it something heriditary or we r just being too freaking polite and doesn't want to sound too show offy when the real emphasise is obviously on the at least thingie and it seems we simply settle for the 'at least' when we didnt manage to achieve anything, how contradictory!. God, i'm rambling.....ok so back to business of writing this blog, allow me to introduce myself (at the same time advertise my slutty ass) and pohon restu from the seniors for i am just a budak baru berjinak ngan this community, i was a chub in denial(maybe i'm still am, i dunno) and still thinks that I'm a babelicious babe but reality hits hard when the amount of rejections (we can know from the eyes and the silent or akward treatment especially when courting unless the guy really appreciate chubs and the like) surpassing my ability even to say ello! But then, it didnt get the better of me, no fecking way, our demeanor is our saving grace and our endurance are priceless, a make believe reality. Anyway, I'm 26 and love having encounters with strangers but seldom will it last two dates or sessions, whatever u want to call it. Never had the privillege to acquire bf/s or maybe lacking the skills in maintaining a relationship, i dunno but it's as fickled as fickle get. Mostly I would assume the agressive passive role and would try ever so hard to please my many one time lover (touch and go). But I think i have ceased to be sooo a housewife, being assertive is quite a difficult thing to practise when you were like before this; when the guy you were with couldnt get it up after so much bragging and boasting from his side, and you smile instead and said takpe....i dont mind saying it if the person was a nice guy but when he was like too demanding in every way, where he sets precautions and rules in everything and you abide to that, and in returns, he freaking couldnt deliver, well...what is tHAT! just remember guys body contact between two people means two people working it to make it work not a literally sleeping partner who just laze around and make you do all the work. Hey aint nothin a free ride anymore, we have way passed that. Honestly I have to admit that I'm rather a shy person outside in the real world but can be pretty daring when i'm in the net, I have never hit anybody off the streets even if he was like this drop dead gorgeous being, i just took a disinterested glance and pretend that nothing happens when deep inside me it's like a Krakatoa ever ready to erupt again. My last encounter was with this guy who responded to my personal message in the mychubs personal ad or something, i coudnt feckin remember and yeah we did have some good jackin off session together (god i dunno whether i'm allowed to share explicit moments in this blog, i know zilch of the rules in here, so if i was way overboard with my anything, pls advise ok) but then it stops there, i's an ok encounter, not that great but ok and he doesnt mind kissing either. I've been like Julia Roberts in pretty woman who inferred that kissing is more for affectionate relationship and not for ons but then this guy started it, so i kissed him back and right at that moment i realised that i'm not a good lay....simply because i have forgotten how to really kiss and it affects my performance as well. Not affecting it completely but slightly affected. And that was like i dunno a week ago, and after that I couldnt be bothered to have anymore meetups, i used to have meetups at least 3 or 4 times a week, a full fledge meetups mind u, but now..hmmmm....maybe i'm getting older. Or maybe LOVE has become something of a requited necessity. I dunno.

Hi there. Well yesterday, Thursday I was in one of the chat rooms of gay.com. Anyway, I was talking a few people, and I had a message from a guy. We got talking. I was impressed to hear he was about 1.8 m and weighed about 120 kg. After chatting some time, he gave me his handphone number. He was going on his coffee break so asked me to call him. I called him. He sounded very nice. He asked me if I could meet him after work.

We arranged a place. i was skeptical. Would I be able to recognise him and he me? The time came and well yes that was him. It was raining heavily. He recognised me too.

As it was raining very havily, he was caught in the rain. So was I. Not much later he said he was feeling unwell, and there was a slight fever coming up. Anyway, as we had already arranged to meet, we took a cab to a shopping centre and sat down at a Coffee Bean for coffee. It was a sort of get to know you session. I enjoyed it. He wants to get togethr again next week for further action. I am quite amazed that I managed to get a chub in a chat room.

It's not too late to wish everyone 'Happy New Year', I hope. May all your wishes will come true, and may u have already fulfilled last year's resolution. I celebrated new year at Nuovo, Kuala Lumpur becoz a DJ was there (Joey Negro aka Jakatta) who played creme and 'house'-y music. Cover charge was RM60 per person with 2 drinks. Twas almost full house, and Jalan P Ramlee outside was full of people also. Across the road over at Emporium there's this drag show on podium, which I later found out was 'Mardi Gras 2002/2003'. Apparently glitters.com performed somewhere on the the streets as well....

Met a new friend a few weeks before through the net. Decided to meet up for a drink and more real-time face-to-face chat. A bloody nice guy, I would say, almost too good to be true (well, that's what I always said when I get to know new people, but this one is the best so far). A Malay bear (woof!), 170, no idea about his weight, has more than 18 hairs per square inch on his arm, wears glasses, short hair, great smile, stuble. Or try to picture Santa Claus minus 40 years. We chatted about everything from music to movies over a cuppa coffe and a plate of 'nasi lemak' (which he finished in about 2.30 min, I like people who enjoy food!).

"Errr, why do you like chubbies?"
"Dunno, I must have f**ked-up my brain or something. No-lah, may be I like what the images of chubs represent, sort of like a happy personality"
"But not all chubbies are happy all the time"
"I know, maybe I like what they represent. Confident funny witty chubs turn me on, especially those in Armani business suits and BMW M5s. Hahaha. Ok, so that one is a joke. My point is, attraction to physical is one thing, but personality or intelligence is another."
"But why chubs?"
"Uhhh, why not chubs? If I wanted a slim,might as well I jack-off in front of the mirror or something. Hehehe. Maybe I'm attracted to something different from me. Maybe. Beauty lies on the eye of the beholder, dear. It's not like I don't find Brad Pitt, or Antonio Sabato or Marcus Schenken-whatever not attractive. I do. But I don't find them desirable. At most, I would want to be like them, but I don't want them. At least, I would picture them as rivals. But I CAN identify a good-looking guy. I believe I'm not a psycho or a fetish."
"Hmm.. ok... whatever. Err, where do you wanna go after this?"

Hi! Apa khabar semua? Mashimaro seems to be having a good time! Well, for me not much to report. I met a guy whom I used to know a few years ago in Singapore. I was walking around looking for a cinema. I suddenly saw this guy. I knew him about 4 yeas ago. He was the boyfriend of one of my girl friends. He was tall then, and did not look very chub then. But on Tuesday when I saw him I was so shocked. He had put on a lot of weight. Now, he would be 175 cm, weigh about 120 kg, waist 42 inches. Last time his waist was about 36 inches. Anyway, we started talking. Talked about old times. I discovered he was no longer with my friend.

As I had my friends waiting for me, I told him I would have to meet him another day. We exchanged numbers. I discovered he has recently been retrenched. He is a malay guy. I told him I would try to meet him for lunch next week. But on second tthoughts, I think I will make it dinner.If he agrees. Let us see what happens later!

Catch you later!

KEPADA SEMUA!!

Happy New Year! May all your wishes come true!

KEPADA SEMUA, SELAMAT HARI RAYA, MAAF ZAHIR DAN BATIN!!

Hi there, Welcome aboard! Looks like we have a Filipino aboard! Kumusta!!

Well, just for info, I had an ex boyfriend from the Philippines. He is also from Visayas. (Bacolod City). Been there a couple of times. Anyway, the language is rather similiar to Malay. Anyway, that was a past of my life!

I hope you will contribute to this column more regularly.

Hi there! Syukur awak dah keluar wad dan hospital! Bila baca apa awak tulis ini, saya ingat apa yang berlaku pada saya 4 tahun lalu! Accident juga! Kaki patah! Masuk wad dekat 26 hari di Hospital Besar JB. Eh....seksa! Dengan sakit.....I wish you all the best! Saya faham apa yang awak mengalami!

Kenalah rehat banyak ni! Take good care!!

TO ALL!!

SELAMAT MENUNAIKAN IBADAT PUASA!!

Our young and talented writer - chubmashimaro a.k.a JoeChub a.k.a Chubbycub40 has met with a motorcycle accident (29/10/02). Although things looks pretty bad now. Has has gone through 7 hours of surgery... 6 stiches on the head and a metal plate in his arms, bruises on the face and body. MyChub reps (GemuK, Abu & Riez) were there with his mother who had flown from Sabah that very morning. When he finally woke up, It brought tears to our eyes when he said he would like to write his experience in this blog, and ask readers to wish him well. To all friends who are sincere to visit/donate - the address is UH, Wad 9U, Bed 32. To anyone who knew him, pls don't bother to call his handphone as it was stolen in the accident. Lets all pray for his life and hope that he will get better and stronger. We love your works and the sunshine you have sprinkled into our lives.

Untuk semua pebaca, kita mest doakan untuk chub mashimaro. Harap-harap dia akan pulih!

Our young and talented writer - chubmashimaro a.k.a JoeChub has met with a motorcycle accident last night (29/10/02).

A LOVE STORY THAT FAILED!

Hello again! Apa khabar semua? Wow......tentang lovers! Dalam hal ini, kita semua kena berhati-hati. Tapi nasib setiap orang tak sama!
Pada tahun lepas, saya telah jumpa beberapa orang online. Semuanya di mychub chatroom di MIRC. Tapi , yang peliknya, semua yang saya jumpa ada dari universiti. Saya telah jumpa beberapa student....ada dari USM, ada dari UM, tapi tak rasa apa-apa terhadap mereka. Saya ingin ceritakan tentang satu perjumpaan. Dia ni seorang cub dari UPM! Tentu jumpa di mychub chatroom.

Saya telah jumpa dia di Sogo, KL pada hari yang ditetapkan. Baik orangnya. Saya tak tahu kerana dia boleh tertarik pada saya! Memang selepas itu, saya selalu naik ke KL untuk jumpa dia. Tiap-tiap minggu saya mesti jumpa. Ialah...orang yang tengah bercinta.

Tapi tak lama selepas itu, dia mula minta duit. Ialah budak u...saya pun kesian. Beri ajalah. Selepas dia dapat apa dia nak, dia dah mula tepikan saya! Eh...geramnya saya! Saya masih ingat pada awal tahun ini. Itu kali petama dia melakukan ini. Seperti dijanjikan, saya sampai di KL. Saya call dia. Dia kata dia akan jumpa malam aja. Saya tunggulah. Tak tahu apa nak buat lagi! Tunggu aja...dia tutup handset dia. Dari pukul 11.30, saya call tapi tak dapat. Malam itu tak tidur. Ingat apa yang terjadi! Accident ke?

Selepas itu, dia hilang macam tu. Dapat e-mail sekali aja! Dia minta saya untuk biarkan dia. Saya tak tahu kemana. Dia tak akan ambil phone call saya. Saya pun naik ke KL setiap minggu untuk cuba cari tapi tak dapat. Saya dapat pada suatu hari bila saya di KL. Talifon dari public. Dia tak sangka itu saya! Jawab. Lepas itu puas saya marah dia. Yang peliknya, selepas itu, dia nak baik semula.

Dia mula hubungi saya. Dia pun minta saya belanja untuk pergi tengok FAME di Istana Budaya! Saya pun bodoh. Dulu dah kena, sekarang beri lagi. Selepas itu, sekali-sekali da terima e-mail dari dia. Tapi baru-baru ini, dia kata dia ada 'adik angkat'! Tak puas saya! Handphone dia pun dah tak boleh pakai. Tapi silapnya, dulu bila nak baik semula, dia beri nombor rumahnya pada saya! Saya dapat tahu nombor handset dia baru ini. 'Adik angkatnya" berikan! Ini tak betul. Dia tak nak cakap yang dia ada hubungan dengan budak ini.

Hari itu, saya paksa dia jumpa saya. Saya dapat tahu semua darinya. Tapi saya masih ingat berapa angkuh dia pada hari itu. Dia kata dia tetap akan bayar apa yang dia ambil dari saya! Dia tanya berapa. Saya buka mulut...terperanjat dia. Mana dia nak dapat duit, dia tanya saya. Ialah dia baru habis uni..belum kerja lagi. Kena bayar loan lagi. Tapi dia kata dia tetap dia tetap akan baayar dan keluar dari bilik hotel saya. Hampir satu jam selepas dia keluar, dia talipon saya dan menangis. Dia minta saya halalkan! Tadi saya marah....mana nak halalkan sekarang? Tetapi selepas beberapa hari, saya talipon dia dan beritahu yang saya akan halalkan.

Orang melayu ada carakan....saya dah nak halalkan...dia tak nak jumpa pulak. Dah berapa kali call dia, tak ada jawapan. Tak tahu nak buat apa dengan dia. Saya harap dia akan jumpa saya sebelum ramadhan yang akan datang ini. Saya harap kita berpisah dengan baik. Dia dah ada teman baru, saya tak nak jadi orang ketiga. Apa lagi saya nak buat???

Hello semua! Saya ni baru masuk group blogger ni. Cerita di sini semua menarik. Saya ingin ceritakan tentang minat saya kepada orang chub. Saya ni dah tahu saya ni gay sejak saya umur 18, bila saya pertama kali berada hubungan dengan lelaki lain. Tetapi selepas itu, saya tidak minat langsung pada orang yang chub. Pada masa itu, saya rasa orang chub adalah orang yang paling tak taste, tak minat langsung. Ialah, masa tu kita pun dah muda dan senang nak dapat mangsa. Sampai saya masih ingat lagi. Ada seorang dari UK. Umur saya dalam lingkungan 25. Dia tinggi dan dari luar, tak nampak macam chub. Pakai jaket dan bergaya tu. dia ajak saya ke rumahnya. Ikut jer. Nak bayar! OK lah tu. Ikut. Bila dah ada dalam bilik, baru saya nampak bentuk badan dia. Tak minat saya. Tapi apa nak buat. Dia nak bayar. Haruslah ikut apa dan nak. Masa itu, baru dia ajar saya bagaimana nak memuaskan dia. Itu cerita lain.

Selepas itu, pandangan saya terhadap orang chub dah tertukar. Tapi kalau ada pilihan lain, saya akan pilih seorang yang bukan chub. Tak tahu bagaimana saya terjumpa dengan seorang chub diSingapore.. Ini adalah dalam 15 tahun dulu. Dia tu merasa sedih. Orang semua pilih. Setiap kali saya tengok dia, semua orang tak nak. Saya pun kesiankan. Satu hari saya pun pergi cakap dengan dia. Selepas itu, dia ajak saya pergi dengan dia. Mungkin saya ikut kerana kesiankan dia. Selepas itu, kami berdua boleh menjadi kawan rapat. Selepas berapa kali projek dengan dia, saya pun dah minat dengan chub. Sekarang dia bekerja di KL. Mungkin orang chub akan kenal dia. Tapi setiap kali saya jumpa dengan dia di KL, kita akan keluar makan sebagai kawan. Saya pun dah banyak pengalaman dengan chub selepas itu. Tapi saya akan tetap ingat kawan yang mengajar saya untuk menyukai seorang chub.

Itulah semua, kalau awak rasa ada sesuatu yang awak benci atau tidak menyukai, jangan terlalu benci. Nanti suatu hari, awak akan tetap suka atau sayang apa yang awak benci dulu.

Hi, moks here. Wow.. seems like mashimaro has lots of fresh encounters that just I couldn't help to join. Well, mine not really an encounter but more like a revelation. I started to notice chubby guys when I was in standard 1. Early huh!. I used to have this crush on a chubby classmate of mine. I had read in an encyclopedia that this urge was called "Gay". So that's when I knew i was gay, but of course, didn't act on that urge that burned deep down, so what did i do? Suppress it....For years. So yeah...i tried to put it in my head that i wasn't gay, you know the whole spell. So this act lasted throughout my whole school years. Even though i checked out some cuties around school, i just didn't think i was gay. I even thought i really liked this girl. And to be honest, you know, if she said yes when i asked her to be my girl...i might be with her right now. But lets not go too deep into that. I am what i am.
Then I went to the University. Everynight, when i went to bed, I couldn't fall asleep. I would lie in bed, and stare, and stare and stare...For hours, till finally i would fall asleep cause i was soo tired. That or i would cry myself to sleep. Either way it sucks big time, and im not talking about in the good way. I don't know where I belong. I would lie there and just rack my brain and think to myself, "There's no such thing as fat gay guys." I didnt fit into the stereotypical "gay" guy. I was fat. I mean look at TV...do they ever portray a gay male as a chubby guy? Where was John Goodman' hot body,?!?! Nowhere to be found. Not in the tv/movie media sense. So to me...i felt as if i was some sort of outcast...a freak, weirdo...fat ass fag. Whatever...all of that was eating me inside, and i was a grumpy. So that's why my life consisted of, eat, sleep, shit, work, go fuckin insane...cry. My daily routine.
Then came my savior. Thank God for the Internet. Because of sites like Mychub, Chubnet.com and other sites like that...I came to find out that, "Hey, I'm not the only gay fat guy around here." Holy shit did that make me feel better. I just wanted to scream out..."I'M NOT THE ONLY ONE!!!!!!" That's a huge weight that was lifted off of me, and damn it felt good. I mean i wasnt out of the clear yet, but knowing that I'm not the only one like me, i felt alright. I felt I belong somewhere. It feels good all inside.

So if you guys ever had the same experience and wants to share with us, we would love to hear it - e-mail to: mychub@time.net.my

(thank you to a good friend - Kurt a.k.a KuJo from mysticinsanity.org - adapted from your log - FYI we all felt the same way)

Well.. it's been quite sometime since i wrote in here. It's not that i don't have any encounters. Just too numerous to write it all and i'm a little short of time. Anyway, there I was one day, at the day market. I was doing some grocery shopping on friday. I do admit that chubby encounters comes at the strangest places. I was walking back to my car with a bag full of groceries in one hand and my car keys in the other. Then I saw him... like thunderbolt rushing in my veins. A very handsome chubby man around his 30's. He was around 168cm 110kg with waist around 42 or 44. He had a fair skin and a cute goatee. He was also very well dressed. With neat shirt tuck in his very good fitting pants. Too well I suppose to be at the market. We share glances. I stopped and walk to his back. Adoring his massive body and good taste. I stood there behind him.. smoking my cigarette. I suppose he was waiting for his wife or something. I think he knew I was watching him as we share a few more glances. Then he walked to his card and stood there facing me. In the middle of the afternoon in the sun. Argghhh.. what should I do.. should i walk to him and say hi ? We both stood facing each other. The cigarette already burt out in my hands and i just could not move. Is he giving me the signal ? I swallowed a deep breath and slowly walk towards him. Eye to eye.. we gaze at each other. Then I panicked and walked the other way towards my car. Darn it.. !!! I just could not find the courage to even say hi. As i went inside the car.. i saw him in my rear view mirror. He went inside his car too and slowly drove off. Double darn.. he was waiting for me to make a move... he was not waiting for anyone else. I felt like a real loser. Sometimes I just wish with we can have a device which just can beeps if we meet someone we like. Like a keychain that we can signal to any plu that we could point if we like him. That would make things easier.. rather than looking for indefinate clues. Anyway to the guy driving proton MAD 4??. I think you are really cute chubby bear and if I had a second chance.. i would love to get to know you better. Beep me if possible...